Archive for the ‘humor’ Category

spam spam spam spam

Tuesday, August 26th, 2008

You can contact me at erictrue@spazquest.org. Junk mail is accepted if the subject line is absurd enough to make me laugh.

Apparently, someone read this and took me up on the offer, because my spam has been improving of late –

  • Two Geeks are making $100,000 per year with a ROBOT

  • We congratulate! You our client!

  • If only we could vote for Ronald again

  • Work it out I did, making my little calculator run for several days from its wall charger, while it calculated some of those coefficients.

  • To: erictrue You’re a moron (Yes, I checked, it was spam :)

  • You better not call me an IDIOT or a jerk

  • To: erictrue Switzerland To Be Devoured By Black Hole

  • {spamit_subject}

  • Dear erictrue@spazquest.org June 00% 0FF

I was ready to jump at that 00% OFF promotion, but they neglected to provide a link or other contact info. Sadness.

Posted in humor | 3 Comments »

PICK UP THE PHONE BOOTH AND DIE

Saturday, May 24th, 2008

(One of many thought-provoking text adventures by Spatch.)

And so you were taken from this place to another place, where you had absolutely no damn idea what it is you're supposed to be doing. It's OK, you'll be all right. Just don't pick up the phone
booth, or else you'll die.

PICK UP THE PHONE BOOTH AND DIE
a NyQuil nightmare by R. Noyes
Release 619 / Serial number 960409 / Inform v1502 Library 5/12
Standard interpreter 1.0

The Town Square
You are standing in the middle of a pretty town square in the center of a nondescript New England town. Like most any other nondescript New England towns, there's not much to see or do here, but
maybe you'll find something amusing and enjoyable to do.

A shiny metal phone booth sits in the center of the square.

>get booth
You grunt with all your might and heave the phone booth onto your shoulders. For a moment or two it looks as if you're not going to be able to lift it, but heroically you finally lift it high in
the air! Seconds later, however, you topple underneath the weight, and the booth crushes you fatally. Geez! Didn't I tell you not to pick up the phone booth?! Isn't the name of this very game
"Pick Up The Phone Booth and Die"?! Man, you're dense. No big loss to humanity, I tell ya.

*** You have died ***

In that game you scored 0 out of a possible 100, in 1 turn, giving you the rank of total and utter loser, squished to death by a damn phone booth.

Would you like to RESTART, RESTORE a saved game, give the FULL score for that game or QUIT?
>

(Note: this post was written in February 2007 — which shows how far behind I am…)

Posted in games, humor | No Comments »